The weird blob shit thing

{{NSFW}}
I was in my bed trying to go to sleep
I was very exhausted after a long day of watching XXX sex tapes on Pornhub.
But I heard something outside...
It sounded like, AOOOOOOIWANNAFUCKYOUINDUASSYUSSSSSSAAAAAAAA
I just shrugged it off thinking it was my imagination
I couldn't go to sleep so I thought I would watch some TV
I was watching the news and this is what I heard,
URGENT NEWS!
MYSTERIOUS BLOB STILL AT LARGE
WANTING TO FUCK PEOPLE IN THE ASS
LOCK YOUR DOORS AT NIGHT
REMOVE ALL DILDOS FROM YOUR HOUSE
I was shocked at this because I remember the Blob saying something about "Fucking in the ass"!
I rushed to my nearest police station and I saw some dude who called himself, "Funnymouth" which I thought was weird.
I told him about the dildo loving blob and how I heard him outside my house.
He laughed at me and threw dildo's at me.
I heard it again right there.
The, "AOOOOOOIWANNAFUCKYOUINDUASSYUSSSSSSAAAAAAAA" like I heard earlier in bed.
I ran out the emergency door and then I saw it.
The blob.
The horrid creature.
He was about 10 feet tall and was so slimy.
I ran out the front door and rushed to my house.
I'm so glad I got away.
I got home and went back to bed.
Wait a second what was that...
AOOOOOOIWANNAFUCKYOUINDUASSYUSSSSSSAAAAAAAA